TONIGHT!

Me on Podomatic and New Website/Myspace

Almost forgot...here are some of the things I am working on.

Website:
http://www.wix.com/djsunone77/homepage

Podcast:
djsunone.podomatic.com

Let's Get It Poppington!!

....god, I am in love with Nicki Minaj!

Any who, there are some interesting things going on, namely more people coming out to Edge Fridays for yours truly (which i am truly grateful for). I have also started a new LESBIAN night at Club Choices in Somerville. Not the typical ladies' night, but we are going to have some exciting things going on, so stay tuned and bring yourselves out!

Back to the grind, children!
See you in the funny papers!

Jumpy

Well, it begins again. The loss of appetite, the constant worrying, the fear of it all. It's not the college students coming back to Boston. It's the fact that I might wind up in the hordes of the newly homeless. 7 days ago, I received an eviction notice due to a promo job that was reported as being income. This has happened before and caused an agreement that I had to become null and void. Or so says the lovely people that run this apartment complex.

I am more angry than anything. I have managed to get together the funds to pay it off, but I am worried that I might still be out on my ear. The process is long (thank god) to get to that point and I will have found another place to stay. In all honesty, I am glad this happened. This neighborhood is volatile and toxic. One of the many vestiges that need to be shed in order to start a new.

The sore spot is that my family has been in this neighborhood since the end of slavery and I feel it's an end to an era. I can only hope that my mother is looking down and saying it's o.k. to let go of this place. Life is bigger than this block, and I am remaining steadfast that I will now be able to being again and start off with a clean slate.

A final note, for any of my other folks that are living in HUD housing....get out while you can. Anyway how, just do it.

Off to spin away the problems of the day..

Talk soon,
Buck Foston (Jason)

well hello...

it's been a while since my last post, but here are the long and short of things.
-i have cried myself to sleep every night racked with guilt and regret.
-i started smoking weed again to deal with problems (which now i am abstaining from)
- the guys i like still don't like me and want to have nothing to do with me unless it's sexual (and most times; not even then).
- i went to me and shane's special place today and was reminded at every turn that i miss him and wish he was there to experience it with me.
- i have a gum infection and need to get it treated asap.
- that i am alone and love will not come back to me anytime soon.
- that there is nothing more painful than losing someone to suicide.
- that i need to get my shit together and pick up the pieces for the umpteenth time in a row.
- that i love me more than anyone else.

that is all
-jason aka buck foston

One Pride Gig Down...3 to go!

There is a special feeling in the city this week. Aberzombies are getting their highlights, Baby Dykes are pressing their button ups, Drag Queens are roaming the city in full regalia..It's PRIDE Week in the (insert Menino mumbel here)cityofboston. This would be Pride no. 5 for me and to be honest, I am kinda over it.

If there was either more of a party vibe and/or more of what PRIDE is actually about, it might be a bit more interesting. As for now, it's parties, marches, and assorted other shit. This is a particularly busy time for me; getting back into djing and finding a new audience to play to. That part is exciting and scary at the same time. But, after this weekend, I will be o.d.'ing on all things queer......

That is until I jump on the bus and go to NY Pride..Heeey!

Last night @ Umbria, the girls had a good time and that is all that matters. I had some tech issues, but then I always do. As long as the ladies enjoyed themselves, my problems fall by the wayside.

Tonight, it's DISCO DIVAS at Club Cafe. So this should be interesting...Let's see how this plays out.

Another sleepless night...

I sometimes do stay up all night and think way too much. In my 3 decades being here, I have experienced some rough shit, but nothing that can't be dealt with through time and having a creative outlet.

This last go round though is proving to be more difficult than even I can deal with. You see, the man I was head over heels in love with (pun intended) committed suicide. We were no longer together, but I thought that if he got his shit together, then maybe one day, we would be. That will now never happen. The initial pain from it was so deafening that I couldn't do anything but block it out.

That lasted for a day. I found myself wrapped around my toilet crying and throwing up; not knowing why he did this or what brought him to this point. The manner in which he discussed this prior was always done in the least painful way possible. He didn't take that route. He chose to hang himself and have his partner find him and here lies the complexity of this whole issue.

The reason we initially ended our relationship was that simple fact.

Time had passed, but he didn't change his ways when we rekindled our relationship. The details of the last break-up are pretty clear cut. He enjoyed having his cake and eating it as well. For this I am truly sorry that I didn't end things earlier.

He had a sharp decent into insanity and I could not take that trip with him. For as much as life can sometimes be unbearable, things do and will get better. I wish he could have seen that. I wish he could have known how much he was going to be missed and could step away from the situation that ended his young life.

Will all the lies, it's so hard to see the truth and honesty in this. There isn't enough weed or drinks to make this hurt less. I have put myself on autopilot as to make it through the days and nights.

I will always love you, Shane. No matter where you are or where I wind up, know that I will always be your baby.